


Desiderium

by cinnabean



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Cas's POV, Castiel isn't mentioned by name because this is his point of view, M/M, Misunderstandings, Pining, Sorry guys, Unrequited Love, destiel is not endgame here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-29
Updated: 2016-09-29
Packaged: 2018-08-18 11:11:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8160118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cinnabean/pseuds/cinnabean
Summary: In which Dean Winchester is in love with one of the Novak brothers and a misunderstanding is had.





	

The paper is crushed in the clench of his hand. If it makes a sound when it slips to the floor, he can't hear it over the roaring in his head, the ceaseless repetition of what he'd just heard.

_I love you, Gabriel._

_I love you, Gabriel._

_I love y—_

On his knees now, outside his brother's door, building up the courage to peer through the cracked door and peek inside, confirm what he's just heard. Maybe he heard wrong, maybe Dean was joking( _he doesn't sound like he's joking, is he joking?_ ) or maybe he was reading one of the countless slips of love letters Gabriel's given daily. Anything but that it was a genuine confession of feelings, from the speaker to—to the intended listener( _not me, not me, not me_ ).

A quick look inside and he wrenches away from the door. Wonders if they can hear the racing thoughts in his head, the screams of his heart as it breaks. Eyes squeeze shut, flash open again to disrupt the memory of what he's just seen( _this can't be happening, there's no way Dean just— _).__

__His brother, leaning back in his desk chair, hands covering Dean's hands( _that should be me!! _) laying on his knees. Dean, who is supporting himself on Gabriel's knees so that he can lean over the smaller boy and meet his lips. Their lips—which are _connected_ , pressed against each other the way he’d been picturing for years… but not quite, because in his mind, his dreams, it had been _him_ on the receiving end, not Gabriel. It had been _his_ shirt Dean had clasped in his fists, _his_ mouth Dean was meeting eagerly, _his_ name Dean was whispering in a hushed, loving tone.___ _

____All that he’d desired for so long… to be given to his brother._ _ _ _

____A rustling from inside Gabriel’s room draws his attention. He should move away, he should, snatch back the paper he’d dropped( _the reason all this is happening, why did I decide to come here?_ ) and sneak away before his friend( _only ever just a friend_ ) or brother noticed that he’s been spying on this painfully intimate moment, but he just—he has to see_ _ _ _

_No, no, no_

____so he gathers the courage to twist back to the opening and_ _ _ _

_this ISN’T happening_

____Gabriel’s sweeping an arm up Dean’s back_ _ _ _

_Look away, look away, look away_

____(but he can’t tear his eyes away no matter how much he wants to)_ _ _ _

____while Dean is slowly climbing into Gabriel’s lap, sliding his hands up his sides to wrap around his shoulders for a better grip._ _ _ _

There’s a burning in his eyes that he recognizes as the beginnings of tears, angrily wiping at his eyes before they can well up and spill. The reality of the interrupted moment crashes into him like a punch to the gut and he scrambles away from the door( _from the truth_ ) and down the stairs to his room where he clutches furiously at the piece of paper and tries to forget. 

How could he have been so _wrong?_

**Author's Note:**

> I may choose to expand on this/turn it into a verse. The slip of paper Castiel has throughout the fic is the idea that inspired this-- the idea that Dean is friends with the Novak brothers Castiel and Gabriel, both who have been pining after him for a while. Cas finds a little note written by Dean, small, simple, that just reads "Dean Novak." He understands this means Dean is interested in one of the Novaks but incorrectly assumes that it is him, and when going to confront him... well.


End file.
